PuterGeek.Com News
Issue # 27

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Hello everybody,
Since we came home for a day and a half I thought I'd bring you guys up
to date.  The banners are coming off the site!  I really didn't like
them, and obviously no one else did either.

I've added a performance section to the Win95 area of the white papers.
And it looks like a "light background with dark text" was the poll
winner, a white background with black text came in third.  So I guess
the site will stay as you see it now.

The new poll asks what your connection speed is.  It should be
interesting to find out what speed wins.

Thanks to the mention of the website in the Langalist ( www.langa.com )
twice in a row I've had to upgrade my server at www.vservers.com, but it
was about time anyway.

In order to help defray my costs I'm offering PuterGeek.Com email
addresses.  If any of you would like an excellent email account with the
ability to have up to three aliases please email me at
webmaster@putergeek.com.  I'll provide 1.5 megs of disk space, up to
three aliases, the ability to keep a spammer from sending you another
email, and since it's my email server there isn't very much traffic so
the performance is great!  Your address would be yourname@putergeek.com.
This is NOT for re-mailing, bulk mail, or business use, it's simply for
personal email use.

Well, it may not sound like much but we've broken the 100 subscriber
mark.  As of this newsletter the PuterGeek.com newsletter is being sent
to 117 people!  I guess it's time for me to learn how to type (g).

Now on with the good stuff...
From the funnies http://www.erols.com/hmmd

Husband:   How about some sex tonight ?
Wife:   No not  tonight, I have a headache.
Husband:   Is that your final answer ?
Wife:   Yes, that's my final answer.
Husband:   I'd like to call a friend.
These are bits of wisdom gained by a father who was educated by his
rather active children.

01 There is no such thing as child proofing your house.
02 A four-year-old's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded
03 If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong
enough to rotate a 42-pound boy wearing pound puppy underwear and a
Superman cape.
04 Baseballs make marks on ceilings.
05 A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.
06 The glass in windows (even double pane)
doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.
07 When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh-oh," it is already
too late.
08 Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, lots of it.
09 A six-year-old boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a
36-year-old man says it can only be done in the movies.
10 If you use a waterbed as home plate while wearing baseball shoes, it
does not leak...it explodes.
11 A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2,000 sq.ft. house
almost 4 inches deep.
12 Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a 4-year-old.
13 Duplos will not.
14 Playdough and microwaves should never be used in the same sentence.
15 Superglue is forever.
16 VCR's do not eject PB&J sandwiches, even though TV commercials show
they do.
17 Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
18 Marbles in a gas tank make lots of noises when driving.
19 You probably do not want to know what that odor is.
20 Always look in the oven before you turn it on.
21.  The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms
22.  It will, however, make cats dizzy.
23.  Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.
24.  A good sense of humor will get you through most problems in life ,

From the Langalist www.langa.com
DOS Reaches From the Grave... to Bug Windows9x

Even after all this time, DOS still sometimes causes trouble. Last
week, for example, Microsoft released information on a "DOS Device in
Path Name" security problem that could cause your  system to crash.

The problem affects the entire Windows 9x line, from Win95 through

Microsoft describes it this way:

     "DOS device names are reserved words, and cannot be used as
     folder or file names. When parsing a reference to a file or
     folder, Windows correctly checks for the case in which a
     single DOS device name is used in the path, and treats it
     as invalid. However, it does not check for the case in
     which the path includes multiple DOS device names. When
     Windows attempts to interpret the device name as a file
     resource, it performs an illegal resource access that
     usually results in a crash. Because it is not possible to
     create files or folders that contain DOS device names, it
     would be unusual for a user to try to access one under
     normal circumstances. The chief threat posed by this
     vulnerability is that a malicious... web site operator
     hosted a hyperlink that referenced such a path, clicking
     the link would result in the user's machine crashing."

A patch to correct this problem will be available soon via
WindowsUpdate, but it's available right now at these locations:

Windows 95:

Windows 98 and Windows 98 Second Edition:

More info:

Speed Up IE4 and 5--- But At Your Own Risk!

I had a long internal debate with myself about bringing you this
tweak. On the plus side, it can significantly speed the loading of
complex web pages--- Internet Explorer will load these pages *much,
much*  faster. But the downside is that the tweak makes IE non-
compliant with the HTTP1.1 spec. If you employ this tweak, you'll be
making your browser nonstandard.

The HTTP 1.1 spec limits the number of simultaneous connections any
one browser can make to a given server. It's a way to ensuring there
are enough connections to go around. This IE tweak turns off IE's
built-in compliance with this standard, and lets your copy of IE open
far more simultaneous connections with a server. This means your
browser can grab many chunks of a web page at one time, speeding load
times. But it also makes your browser a connections "pig," consuming
more than its fair share of server connectivity. It makes your
browser a selfish net entity.

But this tweak is public knowledge now--- reader John Collins dug it
out of the Microsoft Knowledge Base, for example (thanks, John!)---
so I'll tell you about it, with a caveat.

This tweak can be useful as a temporary setting, or for
troubleshooting. But I do NOT recommend it as a permanent thing. Slow
web pages are usually caused by something other than the number of
allowable connections. (Look at my newly-tweaked http://www.langa.com
to see how fast pages can load with no browser weirdness at all, for

But if you want the tweak and aren't concerned about taking more than
your share of connectivity, here are John's instructions:

     In Windows 2000:
     1. Open Regedit (Start-->Run--> and type 'regedit' [without
     quotes] )

     2. Navigate to the following folder:


     3. Find the keys that say:

     4. Change the value of both keys to some higher number

     In Windows 9.x
     1. Open Regedit (Start-->Run--> and type 'regedit' [without
     quotes] )

     2. Navigate to the following folder:


     3. Create the following "DWORD" :

     4. Set the value to any high number (the default is 2)

     5. Creat the following "DWORD"

     6.Set the value to any high number as well (the default is 4)

More explanation: See

                                 NOTE:  I've found this tweak to work
for me so far - Peter

) It Really Does Pay To "Load The Code!"

But don't take just my word for it:

     To: <fred@langa.com>
     Subject: My site traffic has soared thanks to you!
     I'm sure you've gotten many of these emails, but now it's
     my turn! Thanks to "It pays to load the code" and your
     mention of my site www.putergeek.com in your newsletter
     of13-march-00, the traffic on my site has increased
     drastically! Here's some info... On the 13th, I got some
     3000 hits more than usual.

     While I don't write for a living, I know how busy my
     website keeps me, (as small as it is) so I can only guess
     the amount of time you put into yours. I just want to say
     thank you for all you've done for 'puter users in general
     and myself in particular! I've been reading and learning
     from you for some time and I'd like to think that you've
     directly helped me over some of the bigger rocks on the
     path towards 'puter knowledge. Please keep up the GREAT
     work! ---Peter Crockett

My pleasure, Peter. In fact, "Load The Code" is one way we all can
help each other out. So, if you have a home page or website (it
doesn't matter what size), please click on over to
http://www.langa.com/code.htm , and maybe you can get some extra
traffic too!

GRIN - Peter

Just For Grins

Reader Steven Pitts sends this along:

     You think you're smart?? Try this out....Read this


     Now count the F's in that sentence. Count only once, don't
     go back and count a 2nd time.

     There are six F's in the sentence.
     A person of average intelligence finds three of them.
     If you spotted four, you're above average.
     If you got five, you can turn your nose at most anybody.
     If you caught six, you are a genius.
     There is no catch. Many people forget one or more of the
     "OF"'s because in English, the F there is pronounced like a

From Woody's Office Watch www.wopr.com
  By the time you read this the Office 2000 Service Release 1
  should be available for download from
  http://officeupdate.microsoft.com/info/office2ksr1.htm but
  we strongly suggest caution.  You've waited this long for a
  set of Office 2000 fixes, so a few days more won't matter.

  Later this week we'll have a special issue of WOW
  specifically on Office Service Releases that will cover
  SR-1 in some detail.  We've been watching the development
  of this update to Office 2000 in its various stages of

  Here are some quick details about Office 2000 SR-1:

  - There are NO new features in SR-1.
  - You may have read about the addition of Hotmail support
    to Outlook 2000 - but this was misinformation, not
    contradicted by Microsoft for reasons only they know.

  - It's a download of over 25MB or available as a free CD.

  - Updating to Internet Explorer 5.01 is an optional part of
    Office 2000 SR-1.

  - Using the SR-1 patch (downloaded or on CD) will NOT make
    you subject to the Office Registration Wizard (ORW).  The
    ORW will be included in new retail boxes of Office 2000
    that have SR-1.

  - This is the first major implementation of the Windows
    Installer technology to update an application - alone
    that's a reason for caution.

  Regular WOWsers will know that Microsoft's track record
  with Office Service Releases is, at best, erratic.  We
  sincerely hope that this Office 2000 update goes smoothly,
  but little in the testing process gives us confidence.

  If you can't wait, get it from the Microsoft web site.  We
  welcome your questions and comments as
  mailto:Office2000SR@woodyswatch.com .

  We'll watch the release of the Office 2000 Service Release
  1 very carefully and give you a full report in our special
  issue (sent free to all WOW subscribers).

That's it for this issue!

Peter Crockett - webmaster
website: http://www.putergeek.com
mailto: webmaster@putergeek.com
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Last Revised: 10/23/2000